Troubled

I believe that life speaks a tongue of longevity, and humanity is the small twigs that rustle with the breeze…

I wonder intrinsically where my wandering thoughts may be betraying me, though it’s only my decision of whether or not I allow them to forsake me.

To grasp a language that is not my own…

“Grasping my own tongue has proved to be much more difficult than simply touching it to my nose…” I told my friend aimlessly and now I find astoundingly; that is still how my saying goes.

We have prayed for fortune and pardon, wealth and disgrace; love and spite, always seems to be how it goes with the human race.

Fighting future and it’s raised arms of defence; the past is so tempting though it begs for regrets.

Finally now though, I’m beginning to see the patterns in how the Forrest weeps; however still alien to me, these concepts whisper only in my dreams.

Eternal balance it screams as I erupt among the living; pondering of the times I have ceased to be.

Though living is a word for which I think I’d like to redefine as I continue my grapples with reality in time.

Sewing together my farewells like a blanket you can hold once I leave; thread barren it may be, more greetings shimmer downstream.

For now I hope my poetry strikes a chord within thee, and even if only slightly, it was a pleasant read.

A beautiful scenery I imagine it will be, just around the bend of the 7th old oak tree.

Humanity…

I’ve forgotten what the tales of morality even entail.

My heart throbs as you sweep into my life whimsically…

But I’ve been lifting the moral weights of other relentlessly; leaving me weak and frail.

When others treat me as divinity rather than creativity, I lose sight of what I am.

A contagion overwhelming me strangely.. leaving only an object behind.

But oh still… there is humanity here.

My darling reminds me of morality, with but a glance drifting my way.

Your eyes speak of affection rather than objection to an opinion that is not your own.

I feel again as a human being should, rather than a telephone therapist dreaming only that it could…

Morality treated as a treasury of the possibilities that now would be blessed upon you an me.

I’ve been reminded of my mortality, a blessing I could not foresee.

So only thank you I can say to my darling; we were never meant to be.

‘Meet me where our light is our darkness, and in purity we shall lie corrupt’

Leather bound mystery, I’m craving to scan you with my groceries.

Honestly dancing, but frustratingly avoiding the question,

This one I should have never posed…

I know you like video games, well you’re a cod zombie to me;

Eating away my thoughts as I try to sleep.

Oval holes of black, seeping sounds to deafen us down; distraction present.

Keep your mind collected while your ears are messed with.

Don’t put down your focus on a blur, chances are in the rough;

Coralines being called to button up.

Sometimes we all get locked up in the night with the scary stuff…

Waiting for that rayed jumpsuit to come running on the sun,

Finally back from his nightly run.

Then they give us white shades so we can close away what’s lost.

Pretend like nothings wrong and we aren’t miles high…

Still staring at closed shades blocking away our beautiful day.

I like to ask questions because I’d love to know why.

What do you think of the dark, the bright and the red flickering light ?

I’m mesmerized by which methods our brains choose to fight..

Nowadays though…. only white.

Will you pick a number between 100 & 5 , then tell me why ?

You think maybe… there’s a different message on my mind ?

Care to quench my ponders as to why ?

But darling please,

Just don’t ask me back.

‘Meet me where our light is our darkness, and in purity we shall lie corrupt’

A Pandemic to Cure all Ailments…

You know, during this pandemic,I’ve realized a lot of things.

The things I chose that made me unhappy, though in the moment I never realize why; the many things I should’ve been grateful for; the things that I thought I had wanted but didn’t.

I never could have predicted what was wrong until I felt the difference when things had already changed.

An effervescence. A bitter sweet taste.

Soap that suddenly turns to bubbles to reflect the world in a rainbow.

It knows how easy it can pop.

I’m happy. Really, really happy.

I worked too much. I forgot the things that made every day exciting and worth life.

I’ve been in quarantine for 4 days.

And for once, I have time to sweep the patio. For the first time since I was a kid, I cut back all the brambles hanging over the deck. I finished an entire page in my colouring book.

An ENTIRE page.

I MEDITATED.

I felt this CONTENT.

This pandemic,

It’s ironic how only in the moments that we fear our end, do we realize the things that we don’t want to.

People are going to be lost….

It’s the inevitability that’s pushing us to be proactive.

However people have, and still will be lost…..

I wonder,

How many at this moment,

Contemplate their morality ?

Suddenly we realize….

What we’ve created, might be all we get to leave. How we’ve created it, an example someone might seek to follow.

I don’t know who I am.

But for once I don’t know why I ever needed to.

I prayed today.

For the first time since I can remember.

I forgot to give thanks, so I’ll give thanks now.

THANK YOU◦ For all the blessing and curses you’ve given me, oh glorious universe.

If the world was ending you’d come over right ?

I sent you a song about the world ending

I hadn’t realized that it already had

They told me that when I died that it’d just simply go to black

But they used death like it was permanent

rather than a reoccurring patch

Conversations I find, are better had

Now with a mix of scotch and a cigarette in hand

Liquid life please, add some life to my eyes while I dream

Then this reminds me there’s still things for me to see

Though my mind is like ww3

With the falling of each shell ticking down the time I have left

I died with you when I said goodbye that winter morning

But this time it seems

Only temporarily I’ve faded to black

My world with you ended

Bumblebee

To create a world without you

Seems to be harder than I’d perceived.

😴

🐝🐝

Føcus

Rust corrupts the floor through a presentation of bubbling rage, focus flees from me as I attempt to grasp it like wind, cold coffee from a dusty old can and a paint stained binder, touched by many finger prints.

For poetry, I attempt to persevere, though even my writing lives amongst chaos. It’s as if I am the tree, my thoughts the twigs compiled into a jumbled mess and I’m left wonder if the eggs inside will ever hatch.

The prophet, my second attempt reads. What if the answers I need are hidden amongst the pages ? Waiting behind the black stripes on the cover. My mind flits to you like eyelashes fluttering under a blinding light. You’re a pitcher of water filling my glass, but we’ve hit too close and now I’ve cracked. I can’t ask you to fill me faster than I leak, simply an old poster of a once beautiful scene.

Withering away from the environment. What again ? Was the dream that it portrayed ? I asked the golden sands what dream it had gave, but for me he had nothing more to say.

Sometimes I wonder… The mountain tops we see, so calm in their sleep. I wonder if they willingly fold so that we might climb and for a moment breath. Then the highest outlines leading to peaks to which we wouldn’t dare to creep, are simply unwilling to deceive us into thinking they’re simply rocks compiled to sit under our feet.

There are many languages I’ve begun learning to phrase. All have yet to assure me that words will ever really be enough. We see the collision before it occurs, but in truth none of us really look. I could write you a book on all the things overlooked, but that would entail that I myself am not also blind. In reality it seems all this questioning is simply rather deafening to my mind.

How many senses do we each really even have ? I wish to be touched but reject the scenario because I have yet to be touched in a way that skin can only mimic in this tangible world. I crave to taste, for at least when I consume there is something left inside… inevitably breaking down like every other fickle thing we perceive as strong.

Only improperly do I call them things. Though I suppose a thing is what I too am. Does anyone care to debate ? I close my eyes and as a prophet may perceive the future, I remember my past.

My darling sandman, how could I have left you so dry ? I asked you for a dream when you were already mine. Now rather than a pitcher, you’re regarding me like dry sockets where tears can no longer cry. I think now it is time, I learn to focus in my own right. Then maybe we can share an ugly truth rather than a beautiful lie.

THE WORLDxYOUxINSPIRE…Culd we all be friends ?

Tried rooting my beard

Seems youth seeds no longer grow

And now you can’t have nature

Without a credit cards flashy shows

La vie en rose

Is now a perfume everyone knows

I just wanna dream of you like sweat and soap

They say the land has eyes and the lashes tickle your feet

Please be kind it whispers…

As the wind blows garbage to a place your hand can meet

We all make mistakes

Simply for you to make up for them it seeks

I know you guys are friends

Introduce me to someone could you please ?

You corrupt my mind

But with you it ain’t free

To be with you indefinitely

A pretty penny I’d have to be

The world wants more

So in turn we need your friend

But you’re the only one that can help me

Like no else could even pretend

I crave your scent like soap and sweat

They say the land has eyes and the lashes tickle your feet

Please be kind it whispers…

As the wind blows garbage to a place your hand can meet

We all make mistakes

Simply for you to make up for them it seeks

I know you guys are friends

Introduce me to someone could you please ?

Someone I Barely Knew

When did I start only seeing your car over the barrier

From here it seems the tree branches sweep the clouds from the sky

I miss gazing into those metallic eyes wondering if steel could learn to cry

I always saw your actions in grey and your lies in white

But now your black is in the corners of my sight

The tendons to our bridge are starting to snap my darling Achilles heel

This raft won’t carry 2, so rather than be rose I’ll learn to kneel

< Chorus >

How did I never notice we only jumped to red roofs

And you never asked why I saturated myself in blue

You always said purple was a shade you’d never do

I’ve always been a cabin in the woods while she’s a skyscraper in heels

Under this weight even Hercules would keel

-Verse 2-

This loss is like the 4:44 I once loved as it cleanses me

Like you were rot in my teeth and now I have floss

I always hid my bleeding lips under glistening gloss

Before that electric feel, what kinda food shall we eat for this final meal

You could drink my tears while I eat your fears

Then when asked by our peers

I’ll say you’re someone I barely knew

<chorus>

To The Future Blue 💙

You know, one time you woke up bleary eyed, and he said that the meaning of your name didn’t begin to describe the light that opening your eyes brought to the world.

You know, the first time he came over, your first interaction was him lifting a guitar and watermelon Jack Daniels and you lifting a wii remote and sleemans.

You know, one time before sex, he asked you to put on a rick and morty sweater. Not only did you do it, but you made a dance out of it too.

You know, one time you gave up your dream, because someone else had the same one, and the look in their eyes was defeated whenever you got a compliment instead of them. Now their well on their way to that dream.

You know, one time while you were working, you yelled in front of all the customers to your manager “I only take a shit when I’m getting payed for it!”.

You know, one time someone called you crude. So you giggled and burped in their face.

You know, one time you made an elderly lady laugh, because you convinced her that you’d turn all the workers of a bakery, into an orchestra that would take the world by storm.

You know, everytime you preached to no one and everyone, someone was listening.

You know, when a taller Daniel Radcliffe came into your work and you swooned, he swooned a bit too.

Did you know that even if they blame you, it doesn’t mean that it’s your fault.

Did you know that even though you weren’t loved when you needed to be, doesn’t mean that others won’t love you after.

Did you know ? Everytime you pushed them away, there was always someone that kept trying.

Did you realize ?? That through all those walls, someone still always slipped through ?

Did you know ??? That everytime you wanted to die and didn’t allow yourself, it was the universe telling you that you were meant for something more.

Did you know ? I love you.

I loved you yesterday, I love you today, and I will love you when you find this hidden in a dusty old notebook years from now.

Now, did you know ¿ That even though you couldn’t believe it, they love you too.

So when you read this, tell someone you love them. Because saying it, will never make you weak.

Did you know ? Love is stronger than anything?

Did you know ? You’ve always been capable of love, and love, you will always have.

~Blue